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A Presence Of The Wolf

I was suddenly dragged into a room. Unknown to anyone; unknown to me. Probably, 2 people, I knew but they're not the ones that needed to talk to me.



The room felt bare. Dark. Silent. Until he spoke. No, I don't know who he is. The only word that came to my mind then, Mysterious. If you want to imagine, it'll be like the movies where the spotlight is on me and the ones that interviews and observe are nowhere to be seen - only heard.


I felt his presence - no other did I sensed. It felt like the world was only me and him; participants yet observers in our very own way. I tried really hard to be open but I struggled to get words out for him. Everything he asked was questions asked by other Doms. Yet, I barely kept myself straight as I held on for dear life to answer his questions as truthful and honest as I could. Past references, past wisdom came to play as his questions flowed down one by one; questioning my existence in the lifestyle.



It felt like the light was shone upon me when he asked the others if they had any other questions. In to another room, I go, and I've been there ever since.

I saw how he looked like. I was intrigued. The man, that wolf never really got out of my head. Not even when he left. That very day I wanted to check on him - asking if he's alright. But he probably doesn't even remember me much. I'm not anyone close. It had always been a hi and bye.

I can't help it - there's something about him. He's not a mystery for I see a glimpse of pain, of struggle, of a cry for help of being strong. Deep inside, there's a wisdom of an old soul that sees things past a human lifetime - probably that's where the struggle comes. Between what is within and what's out there... which are the truth for every experience hurt and every journey becomes a fall-back. Or so it seems.



A message I received from him. A day prior to meditation with Froggie. I felt his presence coming strong. Fear flowed in - ever so welcoming and Awareness stepped in - ever so clearly. The feeling he gave from the start until today have never changed but the clarity he provides, the structure he sets and the awareness he has - it helps ground the ungrounded side of me.

The desire for him is strong - to be ripped apart and savored very slowly. It is one thing I'll never be able to admit to him for the darkness he embraces becomes his bright guiding light and the darkness I've yet to acknowledge becomes my deepest fear. Yet, he brings out the sides of me I couldn't remember - from the past and the present; subconsciously sending hints, reminding me to embrace what I am and develop myself for who I am.




The presence of the Wolf is a reminder to embrace my deepest emotions. It's not meant to tear me apart or walk me to the depths of no return. Each issue that is triggered drives me to face them, not run. To communicate, not suppress. To understand, not ignore. To embrace, not forget.

It's the presence of the Wolf that is planned beyond what we could ever understand. It's his presence that was meant to awaken the journey of self-discovery, self-awareness, and self-love. The journey of a dragonfly in making, a dragonfly in being.






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